5 Signs He's a Keeper (IBD Edition)
This year I’m celebrating five years of marriage with my husband. For a large portion of our marriage, we’ve dealt with my health issues… my evil colon threatened to tear us apart time and time again, but my man, being the amazing person he is, stood by me anyway… Sadly, I know that not everyone can say that… but I want you to know that it CAN happen. Here are some things to look for in a keeper.
- He holds your hair back while you puke your guts out over the toilet.When you live with Inflammatory Bowel Disease, you have more than your fair share of puking. A real man will stand with you, by your side. He’ll hold your hair back for you and help clean up afterwards if you happen to miss. Ladies, he’s a keeper!
- He will love you even at your worst moments (i.e. the Prednisone Mood Swings).Let’s face it, ladies, between our menstrual cycles and the Prednisone, we can be… well… to put it delicately, difficult to live with. A real man, one you want to keep around, will stand by your side and love you anyway. He will understand that behind that growling, fighting, angry face, is a normally very docile and loving creature. Prednisone is not for the faint of heart. If he’s willing to look past all that, he’s a keeper.
- He thinks you’re beautiful no matter how sick you look or how many scars you have.Living with a chronic illness makes you feel ugly. You look at yourself in the mirror; maybe you have moonface, maybe the steroids cause you to gain a little extra weight, maybe you’re too thin… whatever the case may be, having a disease doesn’t make you feel like a beauty queen. The scars, the hairloss, the pale complexion… If your man doesn’t see your true beauty, he’s not worth keeping. A real man will remind you frequently of how beautiful you are… that man is a keeper.
- He will yell at doctors for you.There are a lot of great doctors out there. But if you’ve dealt with Inflammatory Bowel Disease for any length of time, you know there are also a lot of bad doctors out there. Sometimes you just don’t want to deal with it… either because you’re sick of your voice not being heard or you’re too tired to fight. In those moments, you’ll want a man who will take up the sword and go to battle for you. If he loves you, he will fight for you until you get the best possible care. Ladies, if he shows any signs of heroism, he’s a keeper.
- He’ll stand by your side when all the other men tuck tail and run.I’ve dated a few guys in my day. Most of them would duck out at the slightest sniffle. In all honesty, most guys who do that aren’t really into you in the first place. But you don’t want a man like that anyway. You want a man who will ask for your hand in marriage even after you’re hit with an incurable illness. You want a man who will stick with you for better or worse. You need a man who loves you come what may… and you deserve that. A man who lives up to the vow in sickness and in health will be the man who is a keeper.
To anyone who has been scorned by a man because of your disease, remember, you are still valuable. The man who runs away at the slightest sign of trouble isn’t worth your time. You want a man who will love you and respect you with every ounce of his being. Because, ladies, you are worth it. Don’t ever settle for, or get hung up on, any man who makes you feel like you’re not worth his time.